Animal Soccer World (Dingo Pictures) – Phelous


I did it! I hit the hundred thousand subscriber milestone on Youtube, and I promised you all a special… um… treat? for helping me do that. So let’s review Dingo’s giant crossover mess, Fussballspiel der Tiere! Or… *flat voice* Animal Soccer World *audio clip from the video of singing in German, sounds like a song for an annoying children’s show* Controversial opinion time here, guys, Animal Soccer World is NOT the worst game ever! It’s a pretty horrendous movie though. It’s just kind of hard to really… qualify it as a game. Like any of Dingo’s movies put out on gaming systems by Midas or Phoenix, Animal Soccer World has the same crappy minigames attached to its PS2 release. With coloring and slide puzzles! But it also has regular puzzle mode and a card flip game to reveal a garbage frame from the movie. *sarcastically* What a prize. But still, as far as gaming goes, that is more content than some OTHER Dingo titles on Playstation were given. What really gives Animal Soccer World its infamy is the fact that it’s the best known East West dub, which is due to the fact that it’s – as far as I know – the ONLY East West dub of a Dingo film to get the Playstation treatment. This obviously makes it much more accessible than the now kind of irritating to find East West DVDs of “Alladin” or “Wabuu.” And “Alladin” was probably too long for either Midas or Phoenix to really consider porting over to Playstation or PS2. And Wabuu, well, Wabuu is just too cheeky for either system! *more serious voice* Honestly, I don’t know why they didn’t do Wabuu. clip from Wabuu movie: *cat mumbling* Oh shit! Rawwrrr… But maybe that’s why. *overjoyed voice* But speaking of Wabuu, Animal Soccer World’s got him! And I think this is the last semi-major appearance of Wabuu, so we’re really closing a serious chapter of our lives here. …Not really, cause I’ll probably add him into most Dingo reviews anyway, plus a bunch of non-Dingo reviews. So we’ll all be sick of that raccoon. Still, it blows that once again, we are stuck with a wrong voice Wabuu. Nasally Fake Wabuu: And I, I am very good in the midfield! One thing I was curious about was if another English dub of this movie existed when I found this particular German DVD. On its language section on the back of the DVD case it showed an English option via the Union Jack. So I purchased this DVD to uncover its secrets and found… *flat voice* They lied. There is no English track on here. When you pop in the DVD after getting an amazing animation of “DVD” in the MK3/”The Room” font flying around – to remind you what format you’re watching, I guess – you are greeted by just a still image. Which is an image that’s been used on some of this movie’s OTHER DVD covers, And it gives you the options for Dutch, French, and German, but no English. And yes, I made sure it wasn’t just hidden off the menu by accident. There is no English track on this DVD. So we’re stuck with the stupid East West dub! Animal Soccer World is VERY loosely based on Bedknobs and Broomsticks. Specifically, the one scene in it where the animals play soccer. But Dingo said “Hey! What if we just drugged that one scene out way longer and added nothing to it but a bunch of dinking around?!?!” The cover of the movie promises a much more blatant Bedknobs and Broomsticks ripoff than you actually get here With a ripoff King Leonidas on it. However, there are some bits in this which are kind of similar, like an elephant playing goalie in both. Sadly though, NEITHER movie features a Bart Simpson monkey goalie. Now, this is one of the few Dingo movies which has Dingo Pictures’s name appear at the beginning of it on some versions. Guess they were really… proud? of this one. Though not proud enough to make sure they didn’t mess up the audio at the end of the German one. *dialogue being drowned out by music at a much higher volume than it should be* So after the music being way too loud during the ending scene, then during the credits it just goes really quiet! *annoying Dingo “folksy” music fading out and disappearing suddenly* Dingo made this one in 1998, and while we’re on dates, I have a correction to make for Perseus’s release year I had said 93 originally, because some sources had said that was Dingo’s startup year. But just shortly after I made the Perseus review public, a German VHS rip of the movie was uploaded to Youtube With the credits intact revealing that this was a 92 release instead. Now that we have the Perseus Release Year Controversy out of the way, let’s talk about the gem (*trying not to laugh*) Dingo made six years later. The title card is the most ambitious one Dingo has made up to this point. I mean, look at the letters kind of react to the soccer ball! Yeeeeee! But as for the crossover itself, this is the least ambitious crossover event in history or something. Now the German title here basically translates to (dramatic voice) “The Incredible Football Game of the Animals,” I guess the DVD cover didn’t want to raise your expectations too high, as that’s just… “The Football Game of the Animals.” But the seemingly quite rare East West DVD of this movie named it “Animal Soccer CHAMPIONSHIP.” There’s no championship on the line in this movie, though. So obviously, they stopped printing that DVD once the scandal hit the press. Our never-ending loop of a Dingo track on this East West dub is the ominous drum song. Which starts at the first line of dialogue and then NEVER stops. Dog: *in awkward heavily accented voice with no emotion or inflection, like all the actors* Long time no see. Robin: *long pause* ….Huh? Even when they’re playing other music tracks and even when the Bremen town musicians are singing! (flute track playing over the ominous drumbeat) (people singing in Dutch and German while the freaking drumbeat is STILL playing) This, by the way, is from the Dutch version, which is just one person singing over the German version in Dutch. *loud baritone voice singing in Dutch, while a chorus of voices sings in German underneath him at a much lower volume* (the songs don’t synch properly with each other, either) And of course, the looped track plays over itself at one point. *drumbeat track playing over the already playing one* Dog: What are you doing today? Robin: I don’t know yet Dog: We can visit some friends. Lion cub: Sounds good. I like visiting friends very much. Phelous: *deadpan* Stunning insight. But you’re not gonna enjoy those friends once this test of patience is over! Bird Reporter: There is an undescribable chaos. You can hear the sirens. Phelous: CAN I?!?? *sirens from Silent Hill start to sound in the background* You know… I’d take a nice trip to Silent Hill’s Otherworld over this… Though I will say, as far as an East West dub goes, there is SLIGHTLY more effort being put into the voices And SOME attempt to differentiate some of them *nasally voice* Sure, quite a few just sound like someone holding their nose, but… it’s something! Also, there aren’t long periods in this one of the dubbers just dozing off with only the music playing. And while there are certainly a lot of parts where they’re talking over the wrong character, They do tend to be hitting at least somewhere in the *area* of the right spot for dialogue more often here than in Alladin or Wabuu. And I used to think it was a couple of Dutch people doing the voiceovers in these East West dubs. But I finally found out who really did the voices for East West Alladin! That’s right! According to Amazon, it was none other than Dwayne Johnson and Mark Wahlberg! *flat sarcasm* They truly brought their A-game to this. I really had no idea it was the Rock and Marky Mark in Alladin! The Rock wants to leave you with something, leave you and your angry face with something. [Alladin voice actor] Can you image India? [Audio from The Happening] What?! Noooo…! You know, Rock, you really didn’t have to be in this remake. So our sort-of leads in this movie are Sasha, the dog from Anastasia, and Robin from Lion and the King. But both these characters have been renamed, so Sasha is now Krummel and Robin is Joey. Robin/Joey: (inappropriate older man’s voice) Hey, how you doing? Phelous: (sarcastically)Great crossover special, Dingo! We see King MahGod with his mate for one shot. Which is the only time she appears in this movie with MahGod! I assume his new obsession with soccer was the last straw in their relationship, after him giving away a fortune in diamonds to the endangered animal society. screechy parrot singing: Diamonds are the girl’s best friend! King MahGod: You don’t understaaaand. I had to give it awaaaay. MahGod’s Wife: If you wanted the diamonds to go to an endangered animal, you should have kept them for yourself! MahGod: *disappointed* MAAAAAH GOOOD Anyway, this bird reporter is named Harry, and I’m pretty sure they just redrew Inspector Gadget as a bird to create this stupid character. Sasha/Krummel: But, Harry. What are you talking about? Harry: *croaking noises* Aah aah. Krummel: But where is the ambulance? Harry: I’m just practicing. Phelous as Krummel: Oh, I should’ve known! *derpy hyuck-hyuck laugh* Harry: Ever since I’ve been a reporter, nothing happens. Phelous: Nothing happens! Sounds like a good sum-up of the movie. Rooster: It’s not fun to be a singer when there are no parties. Scene Interrupting Bear: Parties? Where? Can I sell my candies somewhere? (Phelous voiceover, with echo mic effect) (voice clip from 30 Rock) How do you do, fellow kids. Harry: There is no party. Phelous as MaGod: NO PARTY?! MAHGO– Old Man: That means you’re all completely useless! MaGod: OLD MAN!! I’ll eat your faaaace and your skiiiinnnnnn. Old Man: Dyahahahh! Uh, oh, (babbling nonsense nervously) This wasn’t worth it. Duck: (imitating ambulance sound) AH EEE AH EEE AH EEE AH EEE AH EEE Phelous: *flat sarcasm* Ah. Music to my ears. Duck: AH EEE AH EEE AH EEE AH EEE Tio’s father from Dinosaur Adventure: WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE! Nurse Duck from “Jamie” or “Janis” has been called because of the big fight between Diamonds Panther and one of the evil dogs from the Dingo Dalmatians movies. And I guess neither the couple of guys doing the semi-English dub were talented enough to make that dumb ambulance noise. So they just took that audio from the Dutch dub (music from Punch-Out!! plays over the fight) Krummel: Why were you fighting? Evildog: That’s why.
Krummel: Yeah? So? Evildog: I found the ball.
Diamonds Panther: And then he didn’t let me play with it. Phelous: *mock outrage* Balls. I didn’t think the gorilla-screwing black panther could get lamer. But he’s gone from diamond schemes to fighting over balls. Evildog: You just shoot it everywhere. Panther: You are just mad because I can shoot the ball further. Evildog:No, you can’t!
Panther: I can!
(opening and closing mouths with no noise) Evildog: No!
Panther: Yes! Phelous: (sings in growly voice) Anything you can do, I can do better! Evildog: No. Phelous as Panther: Well, that shuts me up. Krummel: Why don’t we organize a soccer game. Phelous: So to stop a fight over a ball, they’re gonna have an organized fight over a ball. Oooookay. Panther: A soccer game. (opens and closes mouth with no sound) Uh. You mean with a team? Evildog: You mean with a real, uh, goal? Phelous as Evildog: I don’t know how to be part of something that has an actual goal. That’s why I’m in Dingo movies! Harry: And I will be the reporter. Phelous: *singing to Inspector Gadget theme music* Doo-da-doo-da-doo, Reporter Birdhole! Wabuu: FOR YOU. Krummel: I will also need a name. Evildog: I already got a name. The Wild Dogs. clip of Ned Flanders: Who are we gonna beat?
Evildog: The Wild Dogs. Panther: Heh heh heh heh. (the standard Dingo Laugh) Our team’s… name… is The Jungle Kings. The kings of the jungle. Phelous: *snarky* Oh, I’m glad he clarified what “Jungle Kings” meant. I was lost at first. Harry: In two weeks the game will take place. Phelous as Evildog: I’m not going to care about this in two weeks. Forget it. Duck: Uhhh, don’t you also need nurses? Harry: Yeah! As far as I know. People always get hurt. Duck: That’s great! Phelous: That is one sadistic, sick duck! Phelous as Duck: Hey, stop fighting! We wouldn’t want you to get hurt! Play soccer! Where you’ll definitely get hurt! That’s great! Great… here… now. (hyenas laughing pointlessly) Phelous: Yuck it up, fuzz balls. You aren’t getting invited to play in the game! Krummel: (slurred mumbling) It’s a shame. We will never play on the same team. [inaudible] will never let me play for the Jungle Kings. Man, that’s rough. I mean the audio. It’s really hard to hear them over the stupid looped track sometimes. (singing Inspector Gadget song) Blow, Birdhole, blow!! The cat on boots shows up to let us know that he’s in this movie, too. But they’ve recolored the Charlie cat from Cat on Boots from brown to gray for some reason. So in their giant crossover movie, Dingo put in the extra effort of recoloring, which they usually don’t bother with. Just to make an obviously reused character look slightly different! …whatever, Dingo. Harry Birdhole and the cat on boots blandly discussing soccer flyers is apparently hilarious to the littlest pelican! Who, even for a Dingo character, looks drawn rather sloppily. And wow, look at that animation of the flyers dropping! I know it’s not much but I’m still surprised Dingo didn’t just rotate them as they fall. We see some more crossovers with the snake narrator from Der Koenig de Tiere, aka the Lion and the King prequel, getting a flyer And the flyers dropping over at the Jamie/Janis farm. Jamie/Janis: In two weeks there is a soccer championships. Farmer: Hey! I thought that pig ran away. Finally, we can kill it! *dramatic chord* Phelous: Hmmm… BDI Dog doesn’t quite fit in with the rest. Evildog: Jacko and I have decided to organize a soccer match. Phelous: Jackoff? Is that the black panther’s proper name? Dog in sunglasses: That’s awesome! Phelous: Oh, you just think everything’s awesome, Poochie. voiceover from the Simpsons: I have to go now. My planet needs me. (random dog making “EHHH” noises) Dog: A soccer match, that’s cool. Phelous as Dog: I’m so happy about it with my angry face. Sunglasses Dog: The kings of the jungle. They have no chance against us. Phelous: Why does the dog with shades on have a blinking animation? Dingo, you just thrive on making nonsense calls, don’t you? Evildog: Who wants to play? We need defenders, attackers. Dog: Uh… Defender. Not-Balto: I can play on the left side. Phelous: Oh, don’t trust Balto, he’s in league with the black panther! Oh, and by the way, I just wanted to point this out. On the Brave the Husky’s DVD cover’s spine, You can still see the original cover where they were just gonna call it “Balto” with “Alto” still being visible. *sarcastically* Good thing they changed that and then proceeded to call him Balto through the whole thing. And while I’m on this rename tangent, you know the couple of times they slipped up and called Lord “Tarzan” in Lord of the Rainforest? Well, they actually censored that by blanking out the audio on the PlayStation port. Monkey: Quick, Sheena, Tarzan’s crying. Monkey: Quick, Sheena, (opens mouth with no voice coming out) Gorilla: That’s true. Tabal’s right, Tarzan is protected by ghosts. Gorilla: That’s true. Tabal’s right, (more open mouth with no voice) Phelous: Anyway, Tarzan is just too censored to play soccer! Get him out of here! Dog: And I, on the right side. Phelous as Wabuu: Our friend Snoopy is just tooooo stuuuupid! Krummel: What can I be?
Evildog: Nothing, Krummel. You are way too small. I was just thinking that this extended Bedknobs and Broomsticks soccer scene ripoff could use a Rudy subplot! (sarcastic voice) Krummel is just toooo smaaalllll! This is gonna be a major story element, right? Ehhhhh…. Krummel: The Jungle Kings will allow Jack(?) to play. And he’s just as small as me. Sunglass Dog: Joey’s father is the head of the lions! (repeats same line more quickly) Phelous:*really sarcastically* Yeah, both those takes were so good it’s impossible to choose! Put them both in! So the dogs get to practicing. …The wrong game, it would seem. But don’t worry! I’m sure no one will make THAT mistake come game time! SPOILER! They will. Dog: Butcher should become a goalkeeper.
Evildog: Hey. Krummel. Make yourself useful. Go get Butcher. You might recognize Butcher here from the Mug Root Beer can. …And also Dingo’s Dalmatians where he was still named Butcher. Bulldog: (almost incomprehensible) And I’m Butcher! (Butcher? Bridgester? can’t tell) Phelous:*sarcastic* Glad they made sure to keep THAT character’s name continuity! (goofy music and sound effect of a ball being kicked) (actors randomly talking as the ball goes flying, then all the dogs doing random Dingo Laughs) Phelous: (deadpan) Oh, that is just too wacky, I tell ya! King MaGod: I myself will not play. I am too old. Phelous as MaGod: That’s right! I am just toooo oooold! And I won’t be busy placing bets on the game! By the waaay, make sure to throooow the gaaaaame! Real MaGod: And everybody has to do what I say. Panther: Yes, sir.
Fake Wabuu: Yes sir. We will listen to you! Phelous:Wabuu would NEVER say that! Suspension of disbelief BROKEN, Dingo! MaGod: You, Jacko, you will become our central forward because the wild dogs fear you the most. Jacko: They better be. Muhahahah. Heheheheh. (not very convincing evil laugh) Phelous as MaGod: How dare you get high before the game! It’s not doooooone. (inhaling sound) Nnnnnoooooooo. (stoned voice) Gopher: (or whatever): Can I play in the defense? MaGod: Yeah, sure. Why not. Phelous MaGod: I doooon’t really care what you dooooo. (stoned voice) Fake Wabuu: And I. I am very good in the midfield. (giraffes laughing for no reason) PhelousWabuu: How daaare that giraffe laugh at the Wabuu! I was trying to be sincere, but NEVER AGAIN! *axe chopping noise, dramatic chord* Phelous: That Wabuu, though, he’s a real jungle king. So Butcher says he’ll only play goalie if Krummel can get a spot on the team. So Krummel gets made a substitute, ending the great “Krummel Can’t Play” story…. sorta. But you know what I love the most? Them constantly discussing who will play what position or be a referee or give out candy or what song will be played! (extremely sarcastic) It’s almost like there’s not much of a story here! MaGod: He’s just learning. You have to explain to him gently. And now give me that ball right away! Fake Wabuu: Oh. And that’s what they call explain gently. PhelousWabuu: Hehem, excuse me. This movie’s giving me brain damage. Phelous: I’m glad brain-damaged Wabuu still has his trademark wit, though. MaGod: Oh no.
Harry: Oh, no. Harry and MaGod together: Oh, no. Krummel:We need jerseys. Can you make jerseys for us? Goat: (in bleating voice) Jerseys, of course. Phelous: Oh, I was worried they might skip over how they got their jerseys. Wouldn’t want to leave THAT to the imagination. Krummel: My sisters and I also need jerseys!
Janis Pig (with a male voice): You? Why do you need jerseys? Krummel: I’m not saying. Surprise. Goat: All right. What do you need?
Janis Pig: Well, it’s like this. (fake incomprehensible whispering) Phelous: I finally found the most redeeming quality of this movie. (softly) Fake whisper fake whisper fake whisper. Oh good! The jungle Bambi is coming to the game. And they even got some sponsors for the game like McJungle! (fake laugh) Ha ha, that’s a good one Dingo. It’s a McJungle out there. (note: he’s holding up the Japanese box to “Mac and Me”) Harry: Bad news! A group of hooligans is on their way. A group of… hooligans. Bondage Duck: Hey! You! How do we get to the area where the fans of the Wild Dogs are standing? Phelous:(total silence) …S&M ducks?! …S&M ducks. Why, Dingo?! Why?? Why are there S&M ducks in this movie? Spiked Bra Duck: Why Wild Dogs, I thought we were for the Jungle Kings. WHHHHHYYYYYYY?! Phelous: This one duck has BOOB SPIKES, even! PhelousWabuu: Animal Soccer World is soooooo inappropriate! Eh heh heh heh! …Eh, it’s not really funny, it’s just true. Stupid ducks. MaGod: You guys are going into area S. If you’re making one wrong move, I will eat you. Phelous: Please make a wrong move. Please make a wrong move. I know King MaGod is a tyrant and all, but wouldn’t you say they’ve already made a wrong move dressing that way for a soccer game? Duck: You old dictator. Lion and the King audio clip: MAGOD! Random animals: Start the game, start the game. Phelous: Even the movie’s getting impatient with all the dinking around at this point. And whoah, wait a second… Wuschel has a friend?! PhelousWabuu: Okay, this is the point where MY suspension of disbelief is broken! Creepy badly drawn monkeys: Start the game! Phelous: Eww! Get them off the screen! S&M Ducks: (chanting) Hey! Hey! Hey! Phelous: D’aah!! Don’t put that on the screen either!! Harry: Dear ladies and gentlemen, we welcome you to the soccer game of the year! Phelous: And the crowd goes wild!! (silence, someone coughing) After the Bremen Town Timewasters, we get pig cheerleaders! Which I’m torn on if this is sort of well done for Dingo or if it’s just terrifying. Probably the latter, but I’m also distracted by the fact that their outfits look completely different in the close-ups versus the far shots! Some animal: With number 7, Jacko! Phelous: (bursts out laughing)
Stupid running panther! Harry: And with this extraordinary hat, it’s Charlie, the best looking attacker of all time!
(I can’t see any hat…) Phelous:Man, I am so sick of this biased animal sports coverage. Vulture announcer: With the number 5. Everywhere feared, Albert. Phelous: Oh, wow. It’s not Dundee this time, it’s his famed Uncle Albert that he mentioned in Lion and the King! Dundee: You’ll get dentures like Uncle Albert. Phelous: Guess I should’ve known Uncle Albert, the Dentured Sports Star. A cheating sports star too. Or just one too stupid to have figured out that this isn’t basketball. But I guess if the refs aren’t gonna call anything, you might as well play the wrong game. Anyway, a lot of these Dingo animals look really stupid redrawn to stand on two legs like this to play soccer. This was very ill-conceived… for a lot of reasons. {overjoyed) Oh, but look at Wabuu playing soccer! He’s so good at it, he’s sprouted a third spring foot. PhelousWabuu: Whaaaaa?! Announcer: The ball goes towards the second post! And ohhhhh! Harry: Sasha surprises Wabuu and gets the ball! Phelous: We only got like two seconds of Wabuu with the ball? This movie is worthless! Announcer: And there is Jacko! Jacko the attacker! And he stops Sasha with a fearless tackle! Phelous: Wait, so the Dalmatian is Sasha now? We’ve got two Sashas and two Charlies? I’m having a real hard time following the Dingo Cinematic Universe. Announcer: (slowed down)A fearless tackle! Phelous: That really didn’t look like a tackle. But that’s probably a good thing. Because he’d be playing the wrong football if he did that. And we wouldn’t want anyone ELSE messing up what game this is! Announcer: Ohhhhh! What a bad pass. Yes, bad passes can happen. Phelous: (deadpan) Bad passes can happen. At least we’re really learning something here! Some bite tackles happen. And yes, bite tackles can happen. Which causes the linesman to break out the elf meter, which is how you know soccer just got real! Also, that’s a really tiny hippo. Must be a house hippo. Voiceover with nature documentary music: House hippos are very timid creatures and are rarely seen. But they will defend their territory. Harry: Ohhh, what a bad decision! The baddest decision in soccer all time! Vulture: But now who’s gonna take the penalty kick? It is… DINGO!! Phelous: …Oh. Is Fake Dingo the star of the Dingoverse now? You know, you could probably call the Dingo Pictures gophers a few things But dingo really is not one of them. Harry: I don’t know what’s really going on down there, cause it’s very hard to see from my position. I will try to get a little bit closer. (Inspector Gadget music) Dog: You stay in the goal and stop the ball! Butcher: I’m not doing it. Only if Krummel shoots. Phelous: Krummel wouldn’t be shooting on you, you idiot, you’re on the same team! Announcer: Here he comes, here he comes! And it’s a goal! Phelous:Yay! The stupid empty net goal has really excited the S&M ducks! Probably too much. Hopefully King MaGod eats them. Harry: Did I see that right? Phelous: (sarcastic) Oh, I’m glad Harry Birdhole got so much closer to the action. Albert continues to cheat, and then a dog gets put down. Much to the damn duck’s delight. Duck: AH EEE AH EEE AH EEE Harry: Castor seems injured!
Duck: That’s great! Phelous:This movie’s very anti-duck, isn’t it? Vulture: We think he’s faking an injury. It can’t be that bad. Phelous as vulture: I mean, we’re not even circling his body! Harry:The big question is who’s gonna replace Castor? Phelous: Oh, yay! Krummel is finally in as a…. replacement. Harry:It’s Krummer! It’s Krummer! Phelous: Oh. I guess his name is Krummer now. (deadpan) What an arc this has been. (whistle blowing, crowd yelling in background) Vulture: And the referee gives a penalty kick. Oh, what a big mistake. That’s what you get when you give a dog a flute. (?) Phelous: Very true. Dogs with flutes should at least be on a leash. Harry: Here he comes, here he comes, he shoots! (incomprehensible blather) Ohhhh! It’s been saved by the goalie! Phelous:I called that before it happened, Birdhole! You got some insider info? The ball falls into the poorly drawn pelican’s mouth. So everyone just goes back to dinking around until it comes back with the ball. Bremen Town Timewasters: (singing overly loudly in Dutch over original German song) Voice clip from Nice Cats: I can’t find my damned hairbrush! Harry: But oh! Oh no! He pass it down… to Yogi! (?) Hey, Krummer, it’s not a friendly game! Phelous: It’s a DEADLY game, Krummer! So I’m glad Krummer immediately proved that they shouldn’t have been put into the game by passing to the opposition. (dorky voice) Yep, that’s a real bummer for the Krummer! Harry: This is a great game so far! Phelous: (annoyed) I DISAGREE! Announcer: Albert’s got the ball! Shoot! Shoot! Shoooooot! Hippo: Over the line.
PhelousWabuu: Looks like I’ve crossed the line again! Eh heh heh heh heh! Announcer: Krummer, shoot! Shoot, shoot, Krummer, shoot! (animals cheering noiselessly) Announcer: Yeeeessss! Phelous: Yaaaay! Krummer did it! They really… proved puppy power in soccer or something. Harry: The game is over! The end score is 1-1 for the Wild Dogs. Phelous: Yo, Birdbrain, a tie score isn’t FOR either team. S&M Ducks: (chanting) Another match, another match! King MaGod:Because there was no winner in this soccer match, Phelous: I take back what I said at the beginning. This WAS the worst game ever. Dingo didn’t even have the balls to put one team over the other. King MaGod: I, the Lion King, decided there is gonna be a rematch. Phelous: Yeah, that’s good, Dingo. Promise to resolve this in a sequel that you aren’t gonna make. Krummer/Krummel: That was a great game, Joey!
Now we can be friends again! Robin’s voice clip from Lion and the King: Mmm, I don’t know. I think we should be enemies.
Myu-Myu clip: Certainly. Phelous: Boy! When Dingo isn’t really copying a story, they sure do love making a story that is nothing but padding! Over half of the movie is just building up to a soccer game. And once that finally starts, all it feels like they’re doing is stalling for more time! And then they don’t even bother to actually settle anything! Animal Soccer World isn’t the worst East West dub out there. I’d say that honor belongs to “Alladin.” But it’s still quite a chore to sit through with the horrid dub and lack of plot. But the biggest injustice was the criminal underuse of Wabuu! Harry: Oh, I don’t think that’s true at all, Phelous! In fact, I’d say Wabuu was Harry Birdhole’s pick for the worst player of the game! Wabuu: I am so sick of this biased reporting! Harry: Uh-oh! This cannot be good for Harry Birdhole! Phelous: (in a Harry-like voice) Oh, looks like Wabuu is going way past the line again. He’s got an axe! This can’t be legal. (dramatic Dingo musical chord) (whistle blowing, crowd cheering in background) Looks like the referee is going to allow it due to the elf meter rule! Yes, sometimes there are elf meter rules. Oh, but it looks like the S&M Ducks are furious with the call! Yes, sometimes for no good reason, there are S&M ducks. But it looks like the referee is saying Harry screwed Harry! (whistle blowing repeatedly) Ohhh! This will truly go down as the Dingo Pictures screwjob. Wuschel: WABUU!! DON’T SHOOT!! Wabuu: I am the greatest soccer player of all times! (dramatic Dingo musical chord) Phelous:And Harry’s head smashes Wuschel into the net! GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL!!!!!!! …And stuff. It’s not a tie. (“Oh Phelous 80s Style” plays over credits) Phelous: Thank you so much to everyone who subscribed to my silly channel and helped me get to the 100k milestone. And now that I’ve reviewed Animal Soccer World, there’s no more East West dubs. (exasperated sigh)

92 comments

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *