Extreme Liquid Nitrogen Golf


( upbeat music ) Welcome back. Now, I’ve never played
golf a day in my life. It’s too slow-paced,
I refuse to use tiny pencils, and apparently,
in grown up golf,
there’s no windmill or 14-year-old couples
exploring each other’s mouths. Ooh, mouths? Mouths. Well, we thought,
how do you make golf better? The answer is simple:
you freeze random objects
with liquid nitrogen and then you whack
the crap out of them,
which is exactly what we did. Today, we’re going to make
golf faster and funner.
We’re Nitro-Golfing! Uh-huh, we have super
cooled a series of objects
using liquid nitrogen. Now we’re gonna see
if we can make a hole in one. You get a hole in one,
I’ll get you a chili dog. Something tells me
that’s not going to happen. Professionals like us refer
to the golf hole as a cup, so I’m gonna hit
a cupcake. Logic. Bagger Chase,
please fetch me a cupcake. Bagger Chase, you ever put
a cupcake on a tee before? – First time.
– How long you worked here
at this particular course? – It’s my first day.
– Oh, lots of firsts
for Bagger Chase. Oh, here we go. Fore!( sentimental music )Whoa!
It went everywhere! – Did it go in the cup?
– Some crumbs did, yep, I got some cupcake crumbs.
I get a chili dog. Nothing says “I love you” like
a shattered bouquet of flowers. Aim high, Link. I have to alter my
professional golf swing. Yeah. Oh my goodness,
it’s crackling. Fore!( sentimental music )( laughing ) – Where’d it go?
– Right there. It all went right there. Look at that.
That was perfect, man. I see nothing in the hole. I took all of the
flowers off, though. That’s like a good
lawn-mowing job there. Take this home to Christie. Hey baby, look what I got ya. Hmm, smells…
like nothing. You can leave
your jack-o-lantern on your porch to rot,
or not. – Aah!
– ( chuckles ) Look at it! Almost hurt
myself on that one. – Wow.
– It’s like styrofoam. – Really cold styrofoam.
– Look at that. This one will make
your head explode.( music playing )Whoops!
( laughs ) Bring that face
over here. Look what you did, Link! Put it up to my face. It’s like the
Phantom of the Opera. Oh, that’s cold!
Don’t put it on my face. This gummy bear is
in deep hibernation. Let’s wake him up. ( sound slowed )
Oh my goodness! Sub zero sub sandwich. What kind of sub was that? It was cold cuts. Dirty diaper. You know what,
Bagger Chase? I think I’m gonna go with
a five iron on this one. I don’t know what that is. It’s the one
with the five on it. Fore! – Ugh!
– Is that real poop, or is that fake poop? – Why don’t you taste it?
– Cellular telephone. Can you hear me now?( music playing )– What is that?
– I don’t know, lick it. Look how many–
who knew that there was
just pieces of paper – inside of a phone?
– It’s just like a– There’s multiple
pieces of paper! That’s all a phone is! And that’s
how golf should be. Totally destructive
and done in four minutes. I think
I’m into golf now. Yeah, we gotta
get a better caddy. Hmm. Good point. Next, we’re gonna
burn your eyeballs with things you
just can’t unsee. Link:Our new GMM poster is
available at mythical.store,
just in time for
your wall’s growth spurt.
Clothe your wall now.

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